Opening Night, V-Day, Book Stores.

This past Thursday was opening night for Uncle Vanya. I went to the theatre in the morning only to realize I had foolishly worn street clothes, when I should have known to dress up. It was O.K., because I had no intention of going to the show in the evening, and I certainly planned on changing before the after-party. But I still felt kind of ridiculous all day wearing jeans when everyone else was donning the dress garb.

As you might guess, it was a pretty busy day at the theatre. I went on a couple errands. Spent most of the day preparing gift baskets for the Board of Directors and the cast-- T-shirts, cast photos, shot glasses, etc. Man, I’m telling you--simple work, yet extremely time consuming and exhausting.

The fun came at the party.

The cast party was held at Pangea on 2nd Ave. Wine, drinks, hors d’ouvres. I had absolutely no business being there. I mean, I was invited, but what did I really do for the show? I’ve been with CSC for three weeks!

Let’s see, Jake and Maggie G., Denis O’Hare, Peter Saarsgard, Mandy Patinkin, Claire Danes, F. Murray Fitzgerald, among others. ‘No big deal.’ That was my phrase of the night. That, and ‘I can’t even believe it.‘ I was star-struck; I’m usually pretty good about that, I’m just not used to being around so much talent-- so many big names at once. It was overwhelming.

I’m kind of ashamed at how I acted, in retrospect. I asked for, and got, a picture with Jake Gyllenhaal, but I shouldn’t have asked. It was extremely unprofessional. Hope I’m not reprimanded for it when I go in on Tuesday. I blame it on the wine. I also talked to both Peter and Austin Pendleton for a little bit, which was cool. You know that these are just people, yet I guess a part of you doesn’t believe it until you’re talking with them.

Today has been a bit less joyous. It’s Valentines Day, and I couldn‘t be more lonely. Kristin and Katie are both out of town. Friends all have big plans with loved ones and significant others. So it’s just me. It’s about a month since Emma and I broke up. I miss her very much.

I spent today over in Park Slope in B+N trying to do some reading. It could have just been my depressed mood, but it really bothered me how many children there were in there today. Book stores are supposed to be sacred ground, yet today each time I turned into a row I had to climb over a stroller. There were kids chasing each other. Mothers yelling after their children. All the seats in the café were taken, so I had to stand up, coffee in one hand, book in the other, leaning against an uncomfortable shelf…You get the point. Book stores aren’t zoos. My philosophy is you shouldn’t be allowed in if you can’t read.

A turning point in life.

I haven't posted for a couple weeks, but that's o.k. They are two weeks that I would love to forget ever happened. They also happen to be a testament to how quickly life changes.

When I got back into Boston, Emma and I decided to break up. Is it fair to make this decision sound mutual, when it was she that had her mind made up? Maybe not, but it was a while coming, and there's no doubt that both of us felt a bit trapped. No more about that--I'm sick to death of talking about it.

So since then, I tied up (as best I could) my loose ends in Boston. I quit Starbucks there, I told my internship I would be moving, and then made a spontaneous decision to head to NY and crash at my sister's place for as long as she'll have me.

That's where I am. Broke and jobless. Out of school. Loveless. Starting anew.

It's nerve-wracking for sure, but it's also kind of exciting. I get myself into quite a few ruts, I want to take this opportunity to better myself. I'm going to be more social for here on out. I'm not going to shy away from challenges and make excuses for myself in the same way I used to. Does this sound like a Lifetime channel drama yet?

In other news, I went to the Irish Repertory Theatre's "Aristocrats" last night. I really liked that--fantastic play. I'm using corny words like 'fantastic' all the time these days. Anyways, I especially liked John Keating as Casimir, but everyone was really good. I introduced myself to Charlotte Moore at intermission, and remembered her the time I interviewed her about "A Child's Christmas in Wales"--I really wish their theatre company well. You have to admire non-profit theatre in NYC.

I've interviewed for a couple of theatre internships. I should be hearing back early this coming week. We shall see, indeed.

Benjamin Button

Last night I saw Benjamin Button. Emma warned me against it last week, but Nathan, Danielle, and Justin still wanted to see it, so I disregarded her warning (for the sake of complacency).

It wasn’t as God-awful as she made it out to be, but I had some issues with it as well. For one, I don’t like movies that use an elderly or deceased person’s diary as a vehicle for the story. Getting into a movie’s premise via narrated flashbacks is a filmmaker’s shortcut--a cheap way of making unconnected fragments fit together without any creativity. The movie attempted to make this new by having it serve as a sort of revelation to the daughter about her real father, but that just made me cringe--especially in light of how unresolved that portion of the movie was.

To the extent that I could overlook that pet peeve, it struck me in a weird way. I enjoyed it, but never got emotional over it. I thought Brad Pitt was really good- interesting premise (interesting is one of those words that carries no weight of its own, but I’ll use it here anyways), but when you think about it the movie sort of lacked emotional depth. I didn’t like Daisy’s character at all--she was kind of a bitch--and I didn’t buy that they ever really loved each other.

I was most interested with the aging and anti-aging effects they used and how well they worked. There was one line about never being able to get back lost time that resonated with me, which I hated myself for, as it is perhaps the most widely dispersed and trite snippet of wisdom.

There are so many movies out, or coming out that I want to see. The Wrestler and Gran Torino both look awesome.