Opening Night, V-Day, Book Stores.

This past Thursday was opening night for Uncle Vanya. I went to the theatre in the morning only to realize I had foolishly worn street clothes, when I should have known to dress up. It was O.K., because I had no intention of going to the show in the evening, and I certainly planned on changing before the after-party. But I still felt kind of ridiculous all day wearing jeans when everyone else was donning the dress garb.

As you might guess, it was a pretty busy day at the theatre. I went on a couple errands. Spent most of the day preparing gift baskets for the Board of Directors and the cast-- T-shirts, cast photos, shot glasses, etc. Man, I’m telling you--simple work, yet extremely time consuming and exhausting.

The fun came at the party.

The cast party was held at Pangea on 2nd Ave. Wine, drinks, hors d’ouvres. I had absolutely no business being there. I mean, I was invited, but what did I really do for the show? I’ve been with CSC for three weeks!

Let’s see, Jake and Maggie G., Denis O’Hare, Peter Saarsgard, Mandy Patinkin, Claire Danes, F. Murray Fitzgerald, among others. ‘No big deal.’ That was my phrase of the night. That, and ‘I can’t even believe it.‘ I was star-struck; I’m usually pretty good about that, I’m just not used to being around so much talent-- so many big names at once. It was overwhelming.

I’m kind of ashamed at how I acted, in retrospect. I asked for, and got, a picture with Jake Gyllenhaal, but I shouldn’t have asked. It was extremely unprofessional. Hope I’m not reprimanded for it when I go in on Tuesday. I blame it on the wine. I also talked to both Peter and Austin Pendleton for a little bit, which was cool. You know that these are just people, yet I guess a part of you doesn’t believe it until you’re talking with them.

Today has been a bit less joyous. It’s Valentines Day, and I couldn‘t be more lonely. Kristin and Katie are both out of town. Friends all have big plans with loved ones and significant others. So it’s just me. It’s about a month since Emma and I broke up. I miss her very much.

I spent today over in Park Slope in B+N trying to do some reading. It could have just been my depressed mood, but it really bothered me how many children there were in there today. Book stores are supposed to be sacred ground, yet today each time I turned into a row I had to climb over a stroller. There were kids chasing each other. Mothers yelling after their children. All the seats in the café were taken, so I had to stand up, coffee in one hand, book in the other, leaning against an uncomfortable shelf…You get the point. Book stores aren’t zoos. My philosophy is you shouldn’t be allowed in if you can’t read.

Jobs, friends, Radio City, James Barbour

When I created this blog I anticipated using it quite a bit more. I guess I get caught up in things. I’m pretty easily distracted.

Since last time I posted, I got an internship with Classic Stage Company. I work there twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays. That’s been great so far; they have a very tight-knit group of overworked people. I’m hoping this will really give me a feel for the general day-to-day workings of a theatre company, and may give me some insight as to what aspect of theatre I want to ultimately devote myself to (other than performing, of course). So far it‘s been a blast. I’ve done my share of copying and licking envelopes, but I’ve also had chances to contribute in more satisfying ways, like drafting outreach letters. When you’re on stage you certainly don’t think about how much work it takes to get the ball rolling. To take part in it lends perspective, for sure.

One of the perks of being an intern, along with free coffee, is tickets to their productions. So I saw Uncle Vanya a few nights ago. Not everyone has the patience for Chekhov, but I do. As expected, there was some great acting--it stars Maggie Gyllenhaal, Peter Sarsgaard, and Denis O’Hare. I was especially impressed with Sarsgaard. The set is also very impressive. It was the first time I’d seen a show at CSC and was surprised at how intimate their theatre is. I believe it’s roughly 180 seats. The show officially opens tomorrow, so tomorrow might be a busy day at the theatre.

In other news, my friend Adam was in town until this past Sunday. He had been teaching in China and I hadn’t seen him in a number of months, so we hung out quite a bit. Drank quite a bit. I’ve also been hanging out with my friend Josh--we’re making a movie next Monday that sort of mocks romantic comedies.

I’m officially broke. I’ve spent the past couple weeks looking for a job. Today, I think I finally found one giving tours at Radio City Music Hall. Should be fun--it’s better than flipping burgers, that’s for sure. I went to see James Blunt last year at Radio City and loved the space. Apparently there’s 18 pages worth of relevant theatre/ hall info that I’ll need to digest.

Craziest thing happened to me today. How many millions of people live in NY? I just left my interview at MSG, and I’m on my way to take a drug test for them, when walking ahead of me is none other than my favorite singer of all time: James Barbour. I knew if I didn’t introduce myself I’d regret it forever, so I did--but I was pretty awkward. (You’re not supposed to have nerves anymore when you’re 22, are you?) Seems like a great guy, though. I told him how badly I wanted to see TOTC, which my ex can vouch for, I desperately did. I feel like I mumbled and stuttered through everything I told him. Oh well, bumping into your idol randomly isn’t something you can plan for, I guess.

BTW: Check out my brother and I singing Lily's Eyes here
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Waiting.

It's amazing how difficult it is to find a job here.

I'm living right down the street from the Atlantic Terminal that is connected to a shopping mall. I spent today collecting and completing applications.

I'm having a hard time feeling like I'm not above all these sales positions, yet I can't even get my hands on one of them.

I applied to Buffalo Wild Wings, Sleepys, Men's Wearhouse, BAM, Crunch, and Barnes and Noble. I've asked about shifts at two different Starbucks. I asked for an application at Vitamin World. Everywhere is fully staffed, and if they're not they direct you to an online application--I filled out a number of them, but I can't help but feel those apps get dumped into a black hole.

On the upside, I got a call from a placement service today--they saw my resume on Monster.com, which I just signed up for yesterday, and they wanted to see if I'd like to be submitted for an Editorial Assistant position with WebMD. That would be pretty sick.

I'm also waiting to hear back from the internships I applied for last week, and a couple more I just inquired about today.

And then there's the gym teacher position at Kristin's school that I have a very good chance of getting.

A lot of waiting. I feel extremely useless at the moment.

A turning point in life.

I haven't posted for a couple weeks, but that's o.k. They are two weeks that I would love to forget ever happened. They also happen to be a testament to how quickly life changes.

When I got back into Boston, Emma and I decided to break up. Is it fair to make this decision sound mutual, when it was she that had her mind made up? Maybe not, but it was a while coming, and there's no doubt that both of us felt a bit trapped. No more about that--I'm sick to death of talking about it.

So since then, I tied up (as best I could) my loose ends in Boston. I quit Starbucks there, I told my internship I would be moving, and then made a spontaneous decision to head to NY and crash at my sister's place for as long as she'll have me.

That's where I am. Broke and jobless. Out of school. Loveless. Starting anew.

It's nerve-wracking for sure, but it's also kind of exciting. I get myself into quite a few ruts, I want to take this opportunity to better myself. I'm going to be more social for here on out. I'm not going to shy away from challenges and make excuses for myself in the same way I used to. Does this sound like a Lifetime channel drama yet?

In other news, I went to the Irish Repertory Theatre's "Aristocrats" last night. I really liked that--fantastic play. I'm using corny words like 'fantastic' all the time these days. Anyways, I especially liked John Keating as Casimir, but everyone was really good. I introduced myself to Charlotte Moore at intermission, and remembered her the time I interviewed her about "A Child's Christmas in Wales"--I really wish their theatre company well. You have to admire non-profit theatre in NYC.

I've interviewed for a couple of theatre internships. I should be hearing back early this coming week. We shall see, indeed.

Almost time to leave.

I can’t believe I have just one more day left in Florida.

I didn’t even make it to the beach while I was down here. That’s mostly because I’ve watched myself gain weight since mid November (especially since I‘ve been down here), and I don’t like going to the beach unless I’m in shape. That doesn’t mean I haven’t taken advantage of and appreciated the weather; I played baseball quite a bit while I was here. But I don’t know how I’m going to deal with the cold again.

This break was kind of like a bridge between school and the real world, and I feel like now that I’m going back I’m officially entering life. It’s a bit overwhelming. In some ways it will be nice not having class, but in other ways I kind of miss it already.

I’m worried about money and about finding a real job, among other things.

Justin came over last night; he went back up to Pennsylvania today. Nathan and I stayed up until 4 in the morning talking and reminiscing and stuff. We’ve also been trying to record Lily’s Eyes on Mixcraft over the past couple days--Nathan borrowed his friend‘s mic. I couldn’t identify for you two bigger perfectionists, vocally. We each must have recorded our part 50+ times and we’re still grossly unsatisfied. I guess that’s a good thing.

Tonight and tomorrow I’ll be doing a lot of packing. It’s kind of weird not knowing when I’ll be back again.

Benjamin Button

Last night I saw Benjamin Button. Emma warned me against it last week, but Nathan, Danielle, and Justin still wanted to see it, so I disregarded her warning (for the sake of complacency).

It wasn’t as God-awful as she made it out to be, but I had some issues with it as well. For one, I don’t like movies that use an elderly or deceased person’s diary as a vehicle for the story. Getting into a movie’s premise via narrated flashbacks is a filmmaker’s shortcut--a cheap way of making unconnected fragments fit together without any creativity. The movie attempted to make this new by having it serve as a sort of revelation to the daughter about her real father, but that just made me cringe--especially in light of how unresolved that portion of the movie was.

To the extent that I could overlook that pet peeve, it struck me in a weird way. I enjoyed it, but never got emotional over it. I thought Brad Pitt was really good- interesting premise (interesting is one of those words that carries no weight of its own, but I’ll use it here anyways), but when you think about it the movie sort of lacked emotional depth. I didn’t like Daisy’s character at all--she was kind of a bitch--and I didn’t buy that they ever really loved each other.

I was most interested with the aging and anti-aging effects they used and how well they worked. There was one line about never being able to get back lost time that resonated with me, which I hated myself for, as it is perhaps the most widely dispersed and trite snippet of wisdom.

There are so many movies out, or coming out that I want to see. The Wrestler and Gran Torino both look awesome.

DMV again, Emigrant

I spent most of today writing for Irish Emigrant. I wrote an article on soprano Emma Kate Tobia and her album “Aisling na nGael” (An Irish Dream).

Writing, when it’s not for fun, takes me forever for some reason. It’s my word choice, I’m so picky about the way I phrase things. It took me a few hours to write this piece and it was only like 450 words--though today it was partly because it took me a long time to translate the names of some of the Irish songs on the album.

When I got up I went by the DMV again. This trip took maybe 15 minutes whole. They treat you like royalty there when you have an appointment, it was amazing.

“Ah, you have an appointment? Pardon me, I didn’t realize! (Brushing off the lint on my jacket and fixing my collar) Right this way, sir!”

New license pictures are always fun. This one didn’t turn out that bad. I was kind of hoping they would just reprint my license with the picture from when I was 15--I’ve long wanted to get to the point where people don’t believe it’s me anymore.

Then there’s that signature pad where you sign your name and it gets printed on your license. I hope nobody actually references a person’s license to verify their signature because no matter what you write on that thing your name always seems to take the shape of the Andes mountain range.

Tonight I’ll be doing some work for my mom, then tomorrow maybe hanging out with my friend Andrew. We shall see.

The rest of my life.

Today I had lunch with my friend Mike. I hadn’t seen him in seven months or so, so it was nice to catch up. We did a cappella together at BU, and we basically reminisced about performing and the people in our group, etc.

I’ve been asked a lot recently what my plans are for the rest of my life, and answering that is always tough. Not because I don’t know what I want, but because life doesn’t always follow plans, and while I know what would be ideal, I also know that to get set on one track means setting myself up for disappointment when the unexpected inevitably happens. I’ve spent much of my life planning exactly how I want things to go, for a while at least I’ll content myself with trying hard and hoping for the best.

What I do know is that I eventually want to settle in New York, hopefully Brooklyn, when I save up enough money. I’d like some kind of writing job where my hours will be flexible, so that I can audition for things.

I was thinking about how competitive the performing arts industry is, and how a recession makes it that much more difficult to break into, when I realized something: It’s not for lack of interest, and often it’s not even for lack of expendable income that the industry suffers. I believe it’s become too centralized. People think of New York as the place to be for theatre, and at the moment it is. But the problem is that there are other markets for the arts in the U.S. that are not being exploited. The countless productions not only on Broadway, but everywhere in New York are competing mercilessly with one another for an audience, when if they were elsewhere they’d thrive.

It’s great that there’s such an interest level in staging productions, but the market needs to branch out. I bet that South Florida would embrace more year-round professional theatre. The fact is, how many shows can one tourist possibly take in on a trip to New York? The most enthused patrons and those with the deepest pockets can only see so much.

A scatter-brained entry

Another kind of lazy day--not entirely unproductive though.

I went by the DMV to renew my expired license. That place is always packed, rain or shine. Random, but I realized that the DMV is one of those places where you’ll find people from all walks of life. If you’re ever longing to bring some diversity into your life, head on down to the DMV. Everyone needs to go there, regardless of race, class, income.

I had already paid through the mail to renew the darned thing, but of course they didn’t send it to me. They said I’d have to wait for a few hours, so I made an appointment for a few days from now.

Then I ate at Denny’s. If you’re curious, I got the French Toast Slam, and it was everything I hoped it might be.

It’s depressing in this house, sometimes. My mom and her boyfriend like to save electricity by keeping the lights off. And the shades they’ve put up are very difficult to slide. As a result, it’s always like a morgue in here. I’m the exact opposite; keeping the lights on all the time--it puts me in a better mood. I guess home can’t be like the Holiday Inn--isn’t that their slogan: “We’ll keep the lights on for you” -- or is that someone else?

My Indians are bringing in Yankee failure Carl Pavano for a year. It’s a low risk, incentive-based deal. I’m so excited about this coming season. Hopefully we’ll compete again after a miserable 2008.

I rested my voice today. Nathan and I recorded a couple days ago, and I’ve been singing non-stop since I’ve been home. I've had the song "If I Loved You" in my head for maybe 6 months now, and it hasn't gotten old yet.

Did anyone see the story on AOL news about this elderly woman who won $10 million in the lottery? Apparently her husband bought this ticket the day he died a few months ago; she just checks to see if the ticket won anything, and it was a big winner.

I could probably buy 9 million cups of coffee with that. I don’t play the lottery, though.

I'm heading back to Boston a week from today. I've got mixed feelings about it. I can't wait to see Emma, but I'm going to be swamped with work for a couple months.

Wow, this entry was kind of scatter-brained.

This is my first post.

So this is what having a blog feels like. Interesting. I wonder what kind of things I'm going to find myself writing about here.

I guess a celebration / condemnation of the Wii is as good a place to start as any. I've spent so much of this holiday season playing Wii Mario Kart and bowling; it's so addicting!

I knew in advance of Christmas that Santa would be bringing a Wii, and I promised myself I wouldn't get sucked in. Yet I did.

There are so many books I want to read, so many things I could be doing to better myself, yet I get sucked in. I get so lazy, and days start to mush together. Where have the five days gone since New Years? I'll never have them back.

Tomorrow, I'll start taking life seriously again (I know, I said that yesterday, too).

My resolution this year was to eventually cut out coffee from my diet. That's a tall task for me because sometimes I drink upwards of 3 cups a day (I guess for someone who works at Starbucks that's to be expected). I've never felt that coffee is that bad for you, but it's difficult to keep hydrated when drinking that much, and if I want to take singing seriously--which I do--then I need to start acting like it.

Goal for this year: get back into theatre somehow. Maybe find someone to send Nathan and I on tour. We're too good to not do anything, honestly.